THE WISE MAN 🙆‍♂️ A girl at a bus stop spotted a handsome man and without hesitating, she went to him and said ...."you look cute, I like you" The man out of shock simply placed his hand on her shoulders and said... My dear, this love, and infatuation are all nothing, you're too young to be behaving like this. Please go home and study hard so that you can have a successful life He then placed a piece of paper in her hand and said...I have written some words of wisdom and religious verses for you, read them before you go to sleep. God loves you And he walks away The girl went back to her hustle in Shame and guilt Before she sleeps she opened the paper and read and it was ...... Are you blind? My wife was standing behind me. This is my number, call me. Anyway, I love you too.🤣

I attended my friend’s grandfather’s burial yesterday, but according to their tradition, during every burial, an old women must come out and announce who will be the next to d*e 😭😫 So this old women came out and said, “The first person to leave the burial ground will be the next to d*e.” Since yesterday morning till now, we’re still at the burial site. Even a 92-year-old women is still here, asking me if my parents won’t be worried about me at home

A man escapes from a prison where he’s been locked up for 15 years.💔 He breaks into a house and inside, he finds a young couple in bed. He ties him to a chair. While tying the wife to the bed, the convict gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he’s in there, the husband whispers over to his wife, “Listen, this guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He’s probably spent a lot of time in jail and hasn’t seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don’t resist, don’t complain. Do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is obviously very dangerous. If he gets angry, he’ll kill us both. Be strong, honey. I love you!” She responds: “He wasn’t kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me that he’s gay, thinks you’re cute, and asked if we had any Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you, too.😭 C: copied

A group of tourists was visiting a crocodile farm and they were in a floating structure in the middle of a crocodile lake. The owner of the farm shouted: "Whoever jumps into the water and swims to shore, will receive $10 million " The silence was deafening. Suddenly, a man jumped into the water. He was chased by crocodiles, but with great luck he was unharmed. The owner announced: "We have a winner!!!". After receiving their reward, the man and his wife returned to the hotel room. The man tells his wife: "I did not jump in myself ... Someone pushed me !" His wife smiled and said coldly: "It was me!" Moral of the story: Behind every successful man, there is always a woman to give him a little push.🥹❤️

So painful💔 After 20yrs of marriage this man finds out That his mother-in-law is the mother of his wife WOMEN!!

I entered a bus, A woman and her 7 years old son were sitting beside me in the bus.🙁 It was raining and all the twilight girls (Prost!tutes) were standing by the roadside. The boy asked; “Mummy, what are all those women doing?. His Mother replied; “They are waiting for their husbands to come back from work. The bus driver turned around and said; “Why don’t you tell him the truth?. Little boy, they are prost!tutes, they sleep with men for money. Said the Driver” The boy’s eyes got wide and asked; “Mummy is that true?” His mother, glaring hard at the driver replied; “Yes.!” After a few minutes, the boy asked; “Mummy, what happens to the babies those women have?.” She replied; “Most of them becomes bus drivers.😂 Up till now, combined road safety officers and passengers are still trying hard to see if they can separate the f!ght between the woman and the driver.

A woman and a man were involved in car accident. It was a bad one, caused by the woman's reckless driving.😭 Both of their cars were badly damaged but amazingly neither of them was hurt. After they crawled out of ... cars, the woman says; “So, you're a man. That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but fortunately we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days." The man replied," I agree with you completely. This must be a sign from God! The woman continued, "And look at this, here's another miracle. My car is completely damaged, but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune." Then she handed the bottle over to the man. The man nodded his head in agreement, opens it, drinks half the bottle and then handed it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and handed it back to the man. The man asks, "Aren't you having any?" She replies, "Nah. I think I'll just wait for the police to come and collect their evidence." (drunk driver's offence) " Adam ate the apple again! "😭

When your dog runs the house

Work bestie deserves a raise for dealing with me 😁👏🏻

childhood memories gone wrong